I am an artist.

In great anticipation of this week’s Hutchmoot conference (really, you should watch this video), I want to post my thoughts that led me to the decision to attend. It’s been over a year of processing, talking, journaling, reading, and even dabbling in creating – all around the topic of creativity and what it means to be made in the image of The Creator Himself. This is what I wrote last winter:

I am an artist.

I don’t know what the product is that I create. I don’t think anyone will ever buy it. But I am an artist because I am created in the image of the greatest Artist. I create because I am crafted in the image of the creator.

Maybe my art, the result of my artistry, is my life. A tapestry carefully woven with people, experiences, and dreams. Tears, heartache, and joy.

At the end of my life, from the eyes of the Almighty, I will see the final art which has resulted. For now, I take beauty in the process of this creation.

Then I realized that this deep pain that penetrated my soul when I watched a sunset, heard a beautiful melody, or watched my flowers slowly die on my dining room table wasn’t something to be avoided, but embraced. The desire to bottle up a moment, a note, a scent and save it for later is the feeling of being alive. The beauty lies in the temporary. The need, then, is to be willing to stay in that vulnerable position that your heart enters into while watching a sunset – this joy that is so intense, yet you know it will be gone in a matter of minutes. Dare you love? Dare you soak it in only to be left in its absence?

Creativity takes vulnerability. My fear of creating stems from my fear of vulnerability. Dare I create something in only the moment? Dare I put my creation on display? Dare I… dare?

To be human is to be vulnerable. To be dependent on things like food, air, water… relationships.

To be human is to create. We are created in the image of God. He is the Creator of all things.

As I prepare for Hutchmoot, I thank God for the opportunity to think on these things and to be challenged to grow. I am thankful for the community I am in and will enter into, with people who strive to create and to live and to grow. After all, it is best to do these things in community.