A conglomeration of thoughts seems to be in order for the day, mainly because I have many thoughts and also some time with which to write them down. This is unfortunate and fortunate, this issue of having time. Unfortunate, because it means that I haven’t gotten work (for over a week now) and fortunate because today I managed to get out of bed before 7:30 which gives me ample time to be productive (i.e. write a blog post).
So the newsletter is being sent to the printer today! Also, I went down to a nearby Polish market, for the second time this week. Yesterday I went down only to discover that they are closed on Mondays! I first discovered this market last week. When I stepped in, my heart SOARED with joy as the sounds of Polish surrounded my ears and the smells of kielbasa brought me back, if only for a moment, to the country I hold so dear. Fear struck me as I greeted the owners with a “hello” rather than a “dzien dobre” and I kick myself for not being so bold. I returned today with prayers before I went in with hopes to make this a regular visiting spot. Walking around the aisles, I see so many familiar items and remember my days of shopping at Kaufland and attempts to make pudding. Perhaps I should try again, Kasia would be so proud. My purchases of the day include herbata (tea, peppermint to be exact) and sok (juice, peach flavored – which I will bring to small group tonight!) and I bough these items with only speaking Polish to the cashier. She even told me my total in Polish. I have found my new favorite place. : )
On a different note (remember: conglomeration), I have been reading Nouwen’s Compassion and it has really been challenging my thoughts of God and life. He speaks here for worrying about the future: ”…our work for the future should be based not on anxiety, but on a vision of something worthwhile in the present. When our schemes for a new world are only an expression of our unhappiness with the present, we risk engaging in what Thomas Merton called ‘organized despair.’” Interestingly enough, tonight’s verse that we’ll be discussing is Matthew 6:24-35: “Do not be anxious for tomorrow…” Also, I was listening to a message given by a good friend of mine, and she made the simple but profound statement: “Do not hope in the circumstance or the result, but hope in the LORD!” It’s simple, but it hit me strongly. Am I hoping for a car, full support, a relationship, etc? Or am I hoping in these things? I think this is a very fine line. And it is God who provides these things! Also, my joy does not come, will not come, once I receive these things I want or hope for — the joy comes now when my hope is in the Lord.
Something else which has caused a lot of reflection for me is the tragic death of Aimee Powell, the sister of a friend of mine, friend of many friends of mine, and SEND MK. I never met her, but over the past week I have heard so many stories of her love for our Lord, the love of the people around her and of her SMILE. She was only 25 years old and told her sister shortly before she died that she finally felt settled, and knew that some change was coming. She was only 25, and God called her home. None of us know how long we have, or how short we have. We have the promise that God will provide for our needs TODAY. And today, my heart grieves for the loss of a beautiful daughter of God on this earth.